Sunday, November 30, 2014

How do you feel?

You know what feels amazing?  

Feeling amazing.

Seriously.  Forget all the pedagogy, the overwhelming stacks of "How to do that thing that you want to to better at" books, the people that have time for independent reading and small groups every day, and find what makes you feel amazing.  Because here's the thing.  The more that you focus on what other people are doing and you aren't doing, the less likely you are to ever get there.  What a conundrum.

But when you find a strategy that fits.  A group of friends that lift you up.  A person that makes you feel innovative.  A student that pushes you and accepts that challenge you give.  Everything seems possible.  And the amazing part is, it is.  

I've been thinking a lot lately about my chosen profession.  How lucky I am to do what I do.  Yet, it is so easy to feel defeated.  I care SO MUCH that I only see the things I didn't get to.  The lessons that didn't go right.  The parent I didn't e-mail.  I lay at night and worry.  It doesn't take me anywhere.  Maybe lower than I was before.  

One conversation.  One conversation can be all it takes.  Want to make the world you live in better?  Make the classroom you teach in better.  Or the office cubicle you sit in better.  Or the bench at the park.  Make you better.  Don't live up to everyone's expectations. It's too many.  Even 12 doughnuts aren't good and I love doughnuts.  There is a limit.  And how much better is that doughnut with someone who makes you feel amazing?  

Find those people.  Be that teacher. Love that teacher. Listen like that friend.  As we enter the holiday season, life gets rough.  So many are reminded of what they don't have, what they didn't get done, who isn't here.  I miss my family so much it physically hurts.  But I have a choice.  I can feel like that or I can live like this.  Like I am the keeper of magic, the idea maker, the chance giver, and the doughnut sharer.  

And why not?  

It feels amazing.